Ke$ha - Tik Tok

There are basically two types of them: the minor, post cinematic clip boss and the head honcho himself. Though both can be pretty frustrating to defeat (trust me, one of them even caused sleepless nights for me), they're the very spice and life of any game.

Here's my top ten video game bosses (ranked according to difficulty, appearance, and scare/intimidation factor).

One thing about Cyber Akuma's for sure. He wasn't placed after Apocalypse for nothing!

While Apocalypse may be big, intimidating and loves to bang his gargantuan fist on the floor, he most certainly can't top Cyber. 

Being the mechanical version of Akuma (which is Japanese for devil, by the way), Cyber's more advanced (obviously) and skilled than his original street fighter self. He's also very frustrating to defeat. With constant attacks (not really giving you a chance to recover), you will really see your life bar decrease and decrease until boom! You're dead and defeated.

Intimidation Factor: SPEED. Cyber Akuma's swiftness is deadly (literally). He'll be in front of you in one second and behind you in the next. Word of advice, do NOT keep your eyes off of this guy. I mean it. He could zoom past you without even touching you.  So once he starts doing that fly-thing, start jumping and throwing whatever orbs (Ryu, Ken, and Chun-Li can do this) or webs (Spider man of course) you can.

She's beautiful. She's Japanese. She's pure. Oh, and she's also a malevolent spirit ready to literally rip you to shreds. Meet Kirie, your very own disturbed Rope Shrine maiden.

Having been chosen to be sacrificed since she was seven, Kirie was kept from the world until she turned seventeen wherein she would act as the Rope Shrine Maiden, a girl they'd kill by basically pulling her limbs and head off. But of course, like any good Japanese survival horror game, something goes terribly wrong before her ritual so Kirie dies with a disturbed spirit.

Now she haunts Himuro mansion in search for victims to disembody as well.

To add to her already scarring history, Kirie is also pretty hard to defeat, which is pretty understandable considering the fact that you can only use a camera with very little film to take her down. During the final fight, she moves quite swiftly and can cause devastating effects on your health in an instant. My number one tip? Don't get scared (even when things get REALLY creepy). I mean, how can you snap the picture that can exorcise her when you're screaming and covering your eyes?

Scare Factor: NOW YOU SEE HER, NOW SHE'S BEHIND YOU ABOUT TO KILL YOU. Like a good Japanese ghost, Kirie is a master in the art of appearing, disappearing, showing up again and murdering. This talent of hers is very much to your disadvantage because Miku (the main character) runs very, VERY slowly and Kirie has a tendency to just show up whenever she pleases. One touch, and it's game over. Oh, and you won't go out without her scaring the living daylight out of you, too.

Be afraid (and very creeped/grossed out).

  8. LEONARD WOLF
Silent Hill 3


If you were called by a suspicious guy to come meet him because he would help you stop an ancient cult from unleashing their god, would you go and see him?

In Silent Hill? Of course!

Leonard asks protagonist Heather (that's you) to meet him in an abandoned hospital because he would supposedly help her bring down the cult he actually belongs in.

Desperate, you agree to see him but little did you know that Leonard's actually a cult fanatic turned mutant hell bent on killing you. Sure you can walk away, but Leonard is also the guardian of the cult seal,  something you need if you want to win the game. Oh and did I mention that he won't stop till you're dead?

Intimidation Factor: HE LIKES IT WET. Hell yes, he does. Leonard, you will soon discover, resides in the sewers of the Silent Hill hospital. Once he shows himself to you, he'll plunge into the water and starts crawling (at an alarming speed) in your direction. Mind, the water is very murky and Leonard's skin blends right in. Be sure to aim that gun at the right place.

Hey. At least she got to keep her crown.

7.CLEOPATRA
Dante's Inferno


See, this is exactly why I don't want to go to hell (or the second circle of hell, anyway).

Queen of the circle of Lust, Cleopatra is the big boss of Inferno's sexually disturbing arena. The former Queen of the Nile basically resides at the very center of Lust, in a tall tower overseeing all the suffering souls who were very unfortunate enough to end up there.

To add to the terror of having to climb the tower in order to get past her, Cleopatra is also huge. No, I mean literally H-U-G-E, like, a million feet taller and wider than yourself, which is pretty much expected from any boss, really. Oh and don't be disappointed if you couldn't beat her the first time. Trust me, you aren't the only one.

Intimidation Factor: SHE CAN S.O.S. HER BOYFRIEND. Yep, Marc Antony's part of the fight, and he's obviously fighting in Cleopatra's team. After coming out of Cleo's mouth (...disturbing...), Marc can lay on some heavy damage on your health. When you finally defeat him, you defeat Cleo as well because once her beau's down, she'll shrink to your size and try to nurse him to health.

I therefore conclude that all Mishimas are devils.

6. DEVIL JINPACHI
Tekken 5


Okay, is the devil gene dominant in the Mishima bloodline?

Much like his relative Jin (not entirely sure how he's related to him, but anyway), Jinpachi Mishima has the devil gene in him. Like anyone with the word 'Devil' attached to him, Jinpachi is definitely a no joke boss. Repeat. NO. JOKE.

No one in my house could defeat him the first time we played. Not even my 21-year old cousin (who plays Tekken like its his life) and brother! Jinpachi was virtually undefeatable.

Until of course my innocent 10 year old cousin tried and defeated him in one round. Just pressing random buttons, she said. Sigh.

Intimidation/Scare Factor: TORNADOES AND THAT EXTRA MOUTH. The environment definitely contributes to the difficulty in defeating this dude. Tornadoes and strong winds blow while you try to attack him. Also, the extra, vicious and creepy mouth on his stomach which, by the way, blasts fire contributes easily to your failure.

Beware the stare.

5. SAE KUROSAWA
Fatal Frame 2: Crimson Butterfly


Don't you just love these evil, sadistic Japanese ghosts?

Another product of a tampered Shinto ritual, Sae is actually just half of the ghost package. She has an identical twin sister named Yae, who abandoned her on the night of the Crimson Sacrifice ritual wherein Yae had to kill Sae in order to prevent hell from breaking lose.

Since Yae wasn't there though, Sae was just hanged. Of course, her spirit wasn't put at rest because of this and so began the hauntings and the usual Japanese horror.

So what makes Sae so much more difficult than other ghosts? Well, let's put it this way. YOU. CANNOT. KILL. HER.

Yep, that's right. She can't be defeated. Yeah, okay I was joking. Of COURSE she can! But only at very, very, VERY, rare moments since she's practically protected by a blood-colored mist almost the entire final fight. Again, being armed with just a camera and about five shots does act to your disadvantage.

Intimidation/Scare Factor: SPEED AND EVIL LAUGHS. Not only does she have that mist thing to shield her from your pictures, but she has her lightning speed as well! So while you're running away from her in that slow Japanese protagonist speed, she's really just a few inches behind you, laughing that haunting, maniacal laugh of hers as she closes in the kill.

...Just ignore the costume.

4. SCISSOR MAN
Clock Tower 3


Though he isn't exactly the most fashion forward boss, Scissor Man is definitely someone you should take seriously. Tights aside, this dude can seriously kill.

With his gargantuan scissors, why couldn't he, anyway. Running in a surprisingly fast speed and with an evil, child-like chuckle, you can't just leave the clock tower without getting past psychotic Scissor Man.

Being his insane self, he won't let you go easily. He'll definitely play cat and mouse with you first which can be pretty scary with the taunting and haunting background music and his laugh. I swear, your hands WILL get pretty sweaty and can slip off the joystick as you let Alyssa (that's you) run past and behind crates to get away from Scissor Man. With your shaky hands and sweaty fingers, how can your final battle with him NOT be frustrating?

Scare Factor: THE DUDE HAS A TWIN. Yes, the Scissor family isn't limited to Mr. Scissor Man over here. He has a twin sister with the name Scissor Woman (of course). Though you face her separately in the game (thank goodness), they both have the same surprise attack, maniacal laugh attribute that can make you jump in your seat. In the end, when Scissor Man dies, he rejoins his sister. You'll see both of their ghosts running around the clock tower. Shudder.

Meet your evil twin sister.

3. MEMORY OF ALESSA
Silent Hill 2

Heh. Whoever said that a memory couldn't really hurt you probably never met Heather and the memory of her past life, Alessa Gillespie.

As you can see, Heather clearly has blond hair and well, clean skin and clothes. The Mem, however, is practically the exact opposite of her. With black hair, a nod to Alessa's dark locks, blood tainted skin and  blood tainted clothes, The Mem is one of the creepiest mini-bosses in the entire Silent Hill franchise.

Found in the old abandoned merry go round  (sounds creepy already), you won't find her until you've circled the ride a few times. After probably two rounds, you'll suddenly see a creepy look alike of yourself lunging at you with a dagger.Of course, the Mem does this at an incredible speed, which just amps up her creepiness.

Intimidation/Scare Factor: NO MUSIC, NO SOUND, NO PROBLEM. While the merry go round goes, well, round and round, you'll find the sounds all around you start to decrease in volume. My advice? Take this as a hint that the Mem is near. With the very silent environment, don't be surprised to hear a sudden noise, which would definitely be your doppleganger suddenly damaging your health (and scaring the crap out of you).

Welcome to Limbo. No, not that kind of limbo...

2. KING MINOS
Dante's Inferno


As far as first impressions go, King Minos is doing a very good job. One look at him and one thing will pop in your noggin: Hard-to-beat big boss.

Though he isn't exactly the very ruler of hell, King Minos still presides over a certain part of Inferno, specifically the arena of Limbo, the saddest (but least sadistic) part of hell where unborn babies, the unbaptized and non-believers are said to end up in.

When you face the King in Limbo's final battle, be prepared to feel the stress ooze through your entire system. King Minos is good at swift tentacle swiping and intense breath...uh...breathing. Of course, with only your scythe and cross to defend yourself, this dude really is a challenge, especially when you see him trying to puncture you with his tentacles as babies with scythe hands try to behead you.

Intimidation Factor: CINEMATIC TERROR. After you've killed Death (yes, that DOES happen), Dante, the protagonist, drops to hell and lands directly in front of King Minos who calls out his sins one by one. The king also tortures random souls he plucks out of who knows where by stabbing them in a spiked wheel and turning it. His message for doing this? This can and will be you.

Don't startle me. You won't like me when I'm startled.

1. THE WITCH
Left 4 Dead and Left 4 Dead 2


While wandering the scary, abandoned streets of a post-apocalyptic world, you hear a woman crying nearby. Concerned, you follow the sound and end up finding a frail looking lady wandering around, sobbing. You follow her and try to get a better look at her, but then she suddenly turns around and starts clawing at you in a murderous speed until you die.

Congratulations. You have just startled your first witch.

In the Left 4 Dead franchise, the witch isn't even a big boss, or a minor boss or a boss at all. However, she made it to this list as number one because she has the best attributes of a great video game antagonist. Deceptive, speedy, some may even say beautiful, and wicked scary.

This woman is definitely hard to beat because for one thing, once you spot her, you HAVE to keep your distance, otherwise...well, I'll get to that later. She can be seen either sitting on the floor, crying, or walking around, sobbing. Either way, do not ever aim your flash light at her or shoot her. If you do, she will be startled, run after you in a way that will make you jump then finish you off.

Intimidation Factor: SHE'S EVERYWHERE! No matter what location you're in, you will hear her disturbing moans and cries. No, don't bother trying to run away, you'll come across her again just the same anyway. One of the ways to keep out of her way is to...well...follow her and the only way to do that is to walk at a very slow speed behind her and pausing every few seconds. Only problem is, stopping for that long would attract a hoard of infected people all bent on killing you.

Before going any further, I would like to clarify hopefully once and for all that My Chemical Romance is not, repeat NOT, an emo band. Sure, their lyrics are deep and they dress in black, but that does NOT make them emo. Seriously, people. Get your definitions straight.

The story continues in the music video for the song Sing where the Killjoys try to break into BLInd to get the kid back. 

The future is bulletproof! The aftermath is secondary, it's time to do it now and do it loud. Killjoys, make some noise!